Growing Gratitude

My friend Lisa is the ultimate Earth Mama, hence her blog:

http://www.earthmama101.com/

One of the things she has challenged me to do this week is to blog about what I am grateful for on Mondays.  So here is goes, Lisa, this blog is for you:

Lisa is someone I am extremely grateful for.  She is one of the most zen bitches I know.  There is something ethereal and peaceful about her.  She also has an edge and amazing sense of humor.  When I met Lisa almost 10 years ago, I have to admit, I was in awe of her. To this day, I still am.  When I blog about  making things happen- that's Lisa.  She recently took all of her zen energy and manifested herself a farm ;0)

Lisa has taught me so much about natural living, patience, and peace.  In our friendship, sometimes I think I am the storm and she is the calm. I thank God we have had each other during this wild ride of motherhood.  She is never afraid to talk about how difficult, lonely, and isolating motherhood can be- all while embracing its challenges.  She keeps it real, while not being judgmental. She always has a hug, a smile, is the best yoga buddy, mechanical bull riding, gardening, down ass chick I know.  Lisa is intuitive and seems to just know when I need her.  Sometimes it seems we are hitting the same ebbs and flows at the same time and an hour or two long phone call is all it takes to get us moving through our walls.  

So Lisa, I am so grateful for your presence in my life.  Your are a beautiful, amazing person.  I have come to love you dearly over the years.  We are going to be old lady friends.  The friends that sit on rocking chairs together and talk about the good old days and our bacon emergency phone calls.

 Thank you for being you, for being such a blessing in my life, and your ability to help me become a better Jane.

I love you!  Thank you for always loving me- even when I am hard to love ;0)
xoxo
J

Make it Happen

I have managed to surround myself with very highly motivated people.

Between getting a doctorate and being at Crossfit almost everyday of the week, I spend my time with people who get what they want and work their asses off to get it.  Yes, there might be some bitching and moaning through the sweat, tears, and finals, but you bet your sweet ass that if any one of these people want something, they go out there and they make it happen. 

This is inspiring to me and in all honesty, it makes me proud to recognize this in myself.  I have made a lot of sacrifices in my life to make things happen and can't is not an option.  I wanted to stay home with my kids- my husband and I made the necessary sacrifices to make that happen.  We don't drive fancy cars or own a home, but having our children home was something we both wanted, so that is what we did.  I wanted to get my doctorate- I am currently busting my ass to get that done.  I sacrifice time with my family and friends in order to find a fulfilling job that will hopefully not only help others, but allow my family some financial freedom someday.  I want to be fit and healthy- I go to the gym almost everyday and eat clean.  I wanted a spiritual life- I church shopped until I found the faith/community that I connected with.  This shit did not just happen on its' own.  I made it happen with the help of a supportive, loving spouse, family, and friends. 

Reflecting on my hard work keeps me constantly motivated and constantly inspired.  I want to do better for the people who count on me and who support me.  Surrounding myself with like minded people helps strengthen my will power when I am feeling like a whiner who needs to throw themselves a pity party. 

I read a quote today from someone on facebook that said:

 "If it's important, you'll find a way.  If it isn't, you'll find an excuse." 

I personally have very little tolerance for whining and excuse making- including my own.  When it comes to making your life what you want it to be, I have one piece of advice:

MAKE IT HAPPEN

So get out there and get shit done today my friends!   If you want something badly enough, think outside of the box and find a way to make it happen. You are never as stuck as you think you are.  Don't be afraid to ask for help from family and friends.  If you want your life to be something it is not, there is always a way to make it work, and if I can help you along the way I am more than happy to do so!

peace, love, and mother efin motivation!

xoxo

J

Focusing on Health

So I just started another 30 day challenge at Crossfit Inspire.  I noticed myself being pretty cranky and rebellious over the previous 30 day challenge.  I find myself tired of focusing on numbers.  Whenever I do these challenges, I do really well for the first couple of weeks and then getting angry, rebellious, and even complacent when I try to measure my health in numbers.  For instance, when I am close to my goal weight, I get a case of the "diet fuck its" and eat more junk.  When I am further away from my goal, I tend to get anxious and upset.  It can seriously ruin my day- which is positively ridiculous.

I'm over it.  Numbers are stupid and are getting on my last nerve.  Weights, body fat percentages, clothing sizes.  Seriously.  Suck it.

This new 30 day challenge is really good for me.  I am partnered with Tara D. and Michelle K. who I love to pieces. This challenge is less focused on weight loss and is more focused on following a healthy eating plan- either Zone or Paleo.  I'm going Paleo since it is pretty much exactly how I need to eat to keep my food sensitivities and migraines under control. 

I'm retiring the scale as a part of this challenge.  30 days without monitoring my weight or body fat.  I'm over it.  I am exhausted of thinking about how my body should look, what size I should be, and how if I just got down to 125 pounds I could fly through pull ups with the greatest of ease.

I want to enjoy my body as it is.  I look good, I feel good, and I'm happy.  I want to eat nutritious foods that make me feel vibrant and sustain me through my work outs.  I want to focus on feeding my family healthy dinners that contribute to their well being.

I am exhausted of feminine body perfectionism and size 0ism.  Can we please move the fuck on???  I know I'm ready. 

xoxo
J

Nuts for Coconuts

Holy shit.  I'm not sure why I have been trying to doctor up the most perfect food for the past two years, but I have seriously done myself a disservice. 

I am talking about young coconuts.  Here is a good youtube video about them if you have never heard of them or seen them:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P3Yd6eC2fx0

One day I was having a serious snack attack.  The only thing I had in my house that remotely resembled dessert was a young coconut.  Normally I make complex smoothies with these bad boys, but that day I decided to just blend the coconut meat and coconut water and sprinkle it with some raw cacao nibs.

Utter freaking perfection. 

It was so delicious and I cannot believe I had never done that before!  I do have the Bentley of blenders- the Vitamix- and I'm not sure if a regular blender can blend the meat into a smooth, creamy drink like mine did, but it is worth a try.  If you can't find a young coconut, you can get a can of full fat coconut milk, blend the solids with the liquids, pop it in the fridge and a few hours later you have an almost pudding like coconutty treat.  I will sometimes add a couple of drops of Chocolate Stevia to it, but I am trying to slowly wean myself off of Stevia.  I get young coconuts at Kimberton Whole Foods in the produce section and they have them at Wegmans too (when I don't buy them all). 

This whole experience speaks to my most recent thoughts about food- trying to cook, uncook, and eat simply. 

Sometimes the raw/paleo recipes out there are so freaking complicated.  It takes a lot of time, a lot of money, and a lot of kitchen know how to make a lot of these recipes work.  As my pallet becomes more finely tuned and is more appreciative of the true flavors of food, I am finding I don't want all the salt and spices and I don't want all of the drama of the crazy concoctions.  They are fun once or twice a week to curb a craving, but it can be mentally and physically exhausting to try to do this at every single meal.  I am no Giada and I do not have hours and hours to spend in the kitchen.

Another thing I am contemplating is protein powder.  I am wondering how useful this really is for me.  I get plenty of protein.  Whether I am eating vegan or eating meat, getting enough protein is not an issue.  So why do I supplement with something, that even at its purest, is a processed food?  Just something I am tossing around in my brain.  It is really fun to have protein powder in a smoothie for some variety, which is why I am really resistant to giving it up.  Plus the protein I use is raw and plant based so I feel like it is really good for me.  On the flip side, it is an expensive ass way to get variety.  Weigh in with your thoughts on that.  I would love to hear what you guys think.

xoxo
J

Listening

For those of you who know me personally, you may not believe that I spend most of my day quiet.  I am usually listening to my kids boss me around, reading, and writing.  When I am around other adults, I get so excited that my brain goes into overdrive and I tend to not be able to control my excitement.  That comes out in the form of massive amounts of talking.  The more I like you or know you, the more uncontrollable the talking. 

I have found myself being a little conversation dominant because of this and have been working this week on really trying to shut up and listen.  There is still a lot of work to do, but the reinforcers of my new "listening to others" behavior are strong.  I am really getting to know the people in my life who I care about on a much more personal level. 

Sometimes it is easy to keep things on the surface.  It is not easy to get "deep" with people and really listen to their needs, their fears, and what is really happening in their lives.  It can be scary to go there and sometimes we feel like our own stresses are overwhelming enough, let alone taking on the stress of others. But by being more attentive to the people I care about, I find that their problems and issues are not added stress.  I am genuinely grateful to get to experience them and their emotions.  I find it helpful and reassuring that other people experience the same emotional things that I do and that we can relate to each other.  This ability to relate creates even more love in the relationship. 

As much as I love a fun, light conversation, it is the complicated stuff that helps me grow and bond with those I love and begin to really understand those I am coming to love. 

xoxo
J

The Open

This summer, the Crossfit Open will be aired on ESPN.  This will be an opportunity for many of the people in my life to see first hand what I do at the gym.  I am so excited.  I'm going to be honest and tell you the real reason why:

Bragging rights.

Okay.  Seriously.  I am tingling at the thought of watching those games with people.  When somebody turns on the television and sees Annie Thoristotor and Chris Spealer, they are going to see what my box buddies and I do every single day.  We may not be quite as fast as the most elite, but we are doing the exact same freaking things.  Some people that I work out with, are pretty damn close to hanging with those elite athletes.  This is amazing to me.  Oh yeah, and back to bragging-I totally hang with elite athletes.  They are apart of my posse now. 

As far as my own athletic performance goes, the braggs are about to happen so put on your obnoxious caps- we are going in.

I am not the top athlete at my gym, but I am performing at a level I never thought possible.  I scale walls, I swing kettle bells, I could dead lift my husband- a skill that could come in very handy someday. I am no fucking joke.  I am so unbelievably proud of all the things I can do that I would have NEVER tried before.  Not because of laziness, but just from lack of knowledge and a lack of understanding that I could do these things. I had never done a chest to bar pull up off a band until Thursday.  Today I knocked out 24 of those babies in 7 minutes in between 65 pound thrusters. At first, I felt really proud of myself, but now I am in the ecstatic zone.

I think sometimes we have to take our desensitized hats off and realize what we are doing as athletes.  We are doing crazy, amazing, unbelievable things.  Because we are doing them five days a week, we forget exactly how hard, how intense, and at what level we are working.  Some of us are really hard on ourselves.  The Open brought tears, anxiety attacks, vomit, temper tantrums, and disappointment.  Yes, we should all strive to do our best and sometimes we do feel like, "I had one more rep in me!"  But HOLY SHIT!  SERIOUSLY GUYS!!!!  LOOK AT WHAT WE JUST DID!!!

I am walking away from my Open experience with a serious amount of pride.  Pride in myself, and pride in my elite athlete friends.  I cannot WAIT to see those games on ESPN and say to whoever is near me, "Guess what?  I can do that."

Pretty freaking bad ass if you ask me and I CANNOT WAIT for next year.

xoxo
J

Crossfit- Not for the Weak or Easily Offended

I was posed a very interesting thought/idea/question/dissertation idea from Eileen P. yesterday.  She asked me if I could write my dissertation on what makes crossfitters do crossfit and why are we all so similar?  I'm not sure if the scientific community is interested in this research quite yet, but maybe after the Crossfit Open is on ESPN, there will be funding. 

This was an interesting thought and really provided me with something to chew on.  I could probably blog for days on this, but I will try to keep it as concise as possible. 

There are so many different people at Crossfit Inspire and Crossfit Exton.  All ages, all races, all socioeconomic statuses, all different occupations, sexual orientations, and lifestyles.  So what exactly is the common ground that brings us all together and we suddenly feel like we have found people who "get IT" and "get US?"

1.  We are crazy  
Anyone who does the things we do could be considered certifiable.

2.  We are in tune to our inner beasts
When people refer to Paleo as Primal, I think that is a good assessment of Crossfit in general.  It is a primal experience.  We cuss, we make sexual innuendo, we throw temper tantrums (some more frequently and more loudly than others), we grunt, we sweat.  There are hot, in shape people all over that place sweating.  Of course it is going to bring out some lewd fun, a random sexual fantasy, and an occasional erection. 

Aside from that, the work outs put you in a place of complete and total discomfort and make you do thing you would never do- unless you were in the wild.    If I were in the wild, you bet your sweet ass I would scale a wall to get away from a bear.  Instead of being chased by a bear, you are being chased by a crazy ass trainer and a group of psycho crossfitters.  And guess what, you do it.  You do all of the things you are afraid of doing and you have the biggest group of cheerleaders behind you when you do accomplish these feats.  And from doing it comes an insane amount of confidence, pride, and determination. 


3.  We are determined. 
 There is a sense of determination that binds us all together.  Even when we get down, we know that we are going to get back up on that bar with that ripped hand and make shit happen.  And there is no one in the room doubting that you can do it.  You are usually the only one selling yourself short and that usually doesn't last long.  I have never heard someone say, "hmmm...I don't think you will ever get a pull up."  There are only yeses and people telling you to do it. 

4.  We are perfectionistic
I have never said to anyone, "Man, I really need to clean up my diet, or get a better front squat" and have them look at me sideways like I do in my non-crossfit personal life. Crossfitters understand the constant striving to be better and to beat your next goal.  They get that average is not good enough and they encourage you to do your personal best. 

5.  We understand that we are not perfect
When we fuck up, we are all there for each other with a pat on the back or reassurance that it can and will be done. 

6. We are competitive
This helps us strive against and with each other to do things we never thought we would do.  I am so thankful that people keep upping the bar, because when they up their bar, I up mine and I have NO excuse not to. 

7.  We are team mates
You guys are my team.  Just like my tennis team in college, there is a special bond that you feel with your team mates that you don't feel with anybody else.  It is a unique experience.  This is what crossfit feels like- at least for me. 

What are your thoughts, my loves???
xoxo
J