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Monday, April 30, 2012

Grattitude Monday

Today I am grateful for my friends and penises.

I had the most amazing weekend spending time with my lovies.  There is nothing better than getting to cut loose and spend time with positive people who make you laugh and feel amazing after a LONG ass semester.  It felt great to get dressed up, do some dancing, and act like a wild asshole at Tara's bachelorette party.  I brought penis whistles and straws which provided a lot of entertainment.  I never want to imagine a world where this type of phallic fun does not exist.  I really want to start carrying penis straws everywhere. 

On Sunday, I walked in the door from the gym and got a phone call from my friend inviting me to a Fellatio 101 class at her house.  Game on.  I love talking about sex. I'm pretty sure if you have had one conversation with me, you are already well aware of that fact.  Needless to say it was a blast.  All of the girls (and our amazing gay friend) laughed, shared, and learned.  I was thankful to have a male perspective so we could check in, ask questions, and get feedback from someone sporting a dick.  I'm pretty sure we all have a few new spicy tips and toys that all of our partners/random strangers will be thankful for.  We had so much fun that we decided to do a Kink class next. Bow chica wow wow. 

I bonded with my friends over penises and bonded with friends with penises for the entire weekend.  It really doesn't get any better than that!


Thursday, April 26, 2012

The smell of Saturday night

I will never forget the moment I found my signature scent.  I was 21 years old and walking around a perfumery in Paris (Epcot at Disney on a family vacation).  I picked up the most beautiful, apple shaped, blue bottle.  When I sprayed it, I was overwhelmed.  I had never smelled something like it and I haven't since.  I turned to my companion (my mom) and asked her what she thought.  She loved it and she bought it for me. 

That day in Paris (Epcot) changed my Saturday nights forever.

My favorite perfume has accompanied me on many, many wild nights.  The last thing I do before I leave my house on a night out is put it on.  It is my exclamation point.  My scent makes me feel sexy and a little dangerous.  It helps me put the mom away for the night and bring out the sensual part of me that has been stifled.  It helps me remember who I was before I had my kids.  I remember she still exists and gets to come out and play sometimes too- except her play dates involve vodka, dancing, and flirting.  

I have worn my perfume for 11 years now.  It has been with me through many unforgettable evenings. This Saturday night is my best friend's bachelorette party and it is going to be sealed with a spray.


Monday, April 23, 2012

Growing Gratitude

My friend Lisa is the ultimate Earth Mama, hence her blog:


One of the things she has challenged me to do this week is to blog about what I am grateful for on Mondays.  So here is goes, Lisa, this blog is for you:

Lisa is someone I am extremely grateful for.  She is one of the most zen bitches I know.  There is something ethereal and peaceful about her.  She also has an edge and amazing sense of humor.  When I met Lisa almost 10 years ago, I have to admit, I was in awe of her. To this day, I still am.  When I blog about  making things happen- that's Lisa.  She recently took all of her zen energy and manifested herself a farm ;0)

Lisa has taught me so much about natural living, patience, and peace.  In our friendship, sometimes I think I am the storm and she is the calm. I thank God we have had each other during this wild ride of motherhood.  She is never afraid to talk about how difficult, lonely, and isolating motherhood can be- all while embracing its challenges.  She keeps it real, while not being judgmental. She always has a hug, a smile, is the best yoga buddy, mechanical bull riding, gardening, down ass chick I know.  Lisa is intuitive and seems to just know when I need her.  Sometimes it seems we are hitting the same ebbs and flows at the same time and an hour or two long phone call is all it takes to get us moving through our walls.  

So Lisa, I am so grateful for your presence in my life.  Your are a beautiful, amazing person.  I have come to love you dearly over the years.  We are going to be old lady friends.  The friends that sit on rocking chairs together and talk about the good old days and our bacon emergency phone calls.

 Thank you for being you, for being such a blessing in my life, and your ability to help me become a better Jane.

I love you!  Thank you for always loving me- even when I am hard to love ;0)

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Make it Happen

I have managed to surround myself with very highly motivated people.

Between getting a doctorate and being at Crossfit almost everyday of the week, I spend my time with people who get what they want and work their asses off to get it.  Yes, there might be some bitching and moaning through the sweat, tears, and finals, but you bet your sweet ass that if any one of these people want something, they go out there and they make it happen. 

This is inspiring to me and in all honesty, it makes me proud to recognize this in myself.  I have made a lot of sacrifices in my life to make things happen and can't is not an option.  I wanted to stay home with my kids- my husband and I made the necessary sacrifices to make that happen.  We don't drive fancy cars or own a home, but having our children home was something we both wanted, so that is what we did.  I wanted to get my doctorate- I am currently busting my ass to get that done.  I sacrifice time with my family and friends in order to find a fulfilling job that will hopefully not only help others, but allow my family some financial freedom someday.  I want to be fit and healthy- I go to the gym almost everyday and eat clean.  I wanted a spiritual life- I church shopped until I found the faith/community that I connected with.  This shit did not just happen on its' own.  I made it happen with the help of a supportive, loving spouse, family, and friends. 

Reflecting on my hard work keeps me constantly motivated and constantly inspired.  I want to do better for the people who count on me and who support me.  Surrounding myself with like minded people helps strengthen my will power when I am feeling like a whiner who needs to throw themselves a pity party. 
I read a quote today from someone on facebook that said:
 "If it's important, you'll find a way.  If it isn't, you'll find an excuse." 
I personally have very little tolerance for whining and excuse making- including my own.  When it comes to making your life what you want it to be, I have one piece of advice:
So get out there and get shit done today my friends!   If you want something badly enough, think outside of the box and find a way to make it happen. You are never as stuck as you think you are.  Don't be afraid to ask for help from family and friends.  If you want your life to be something it is not, there is always a way to make it work, and if I can help you along the way I am more than happy to do so!
peace, love, and mother efin motivation!

Monday, April 2, 2012

Focusing on Health

So I just started another 30 day challenge at Crossfit Inspire.  I noticed myself being pretty cranky and rebellious over the previous 30 day challenge.  I find myself tired of focusing on numbers.  Whenever I do these challenges, I do really well for the first couple of weeks and then getting angry, rebellious, and even complacent when I try to measure my health in numbers.  For instance, when I am close to my goal weight, I get a case of the "diet fuck its" and eat more junk.  When I am further away from my goal, I tend to get anxious and upset.  It can seriously ruin my day- which is positively ridiculous.

I'm over it.  Numbers are stupid and are getting on my last nerve.  Weights, body fat percentages, clothing sizes.  Seriously.  Suck it.

This new 30 day challenge is really good for me.  I am partnered with Tara D. and Michelle K. who I love to pieces. This challenge is less focused on weight loss and is more focused on following a healthy eating plan- either Zone or Paleo.  I'm going Paleo since it is pretty much exactly how I need to eat to keep my food sensitivities and migraines under control. 

I'm retiring the scale as a part of this challenge.  30 days without monitoring my weight or body fat.  I'm over it.  I am exhausted of thinking about how my body should look, what size I should be, and how if I just got down to 125 pounds I could fly through pull ups with the greatest of ease.

I want to enjoy my body as it is.  I look good, I feel good, and I'm happy.  I want to eat nutritious foods that make me feel vibrant and sustain me through my work outs.  I want to focus on feeding my family healthy dinners that contribute to their well being.

I am exhausted of feminine body perfectionism and size 0ism.  Can we please move the fuck on???  I know I'm ready.