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Monday, April 2, 2012

Focusing on Health

So I just started another 30 day challenge at Crossfit Inspire.  I noticed myself being pretty cranky and rebellious over the previous 30 day challenge.  I find myself tired of focusing on numbers.  Whenever I do these challenges, I do really well for the first couple of weeks and then getting angry, rebellious, and even complacent when I try to measure my health in numbers.  For instance, when I am close to my goal weight, I get a case of the "diet fuck its" and eat more junk.  When I am further away from my goal, I tend to get anxious and upset.  It can seriously ruin my day- which is positively ridiculous.

I'm over it.  Numbers are stupid and are getting on my last nerve.  Weights, body fat percentages, clothing sizes.  Seriously.  Suck it.

This new 30 day challenge is really good for me.  I am partnered with Tara D. and Michelle K. who I love to pieces. This challenge is less focused on weight loss and is more focused on following a healthy eating plan- either Zone or Paleo.  I'm going Paleo since it is pretty much exactly how I need to eat to keep my food sensitivities and migraines under control. 

I'm retiring the scale as a part of this challenge.  30 days without monitoring my weight or body fat.  I'm over it.  I am exhausted of thinking about how my body should look, what size I should be, and how if I just got down to 125 pounds I could fly through pull ups with the greatest of ease.

I want to enjoy my body as it is.  I look good, I feel good, and I'm happy.  I want to eat nutritious foods that make me feel vibrant and sustain me through my work outs.  I want to focus on feeding my family healthy dinners that contribute to their well being.

I am exhausted of feminine body perfectionism and size 0ism.  Can we please move the fuck on???  I know I'm ready. 


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