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Thursday, April 18, 2013

Female Body Satisfaction

One aspect of psychology I have begin to do work in is feminine body satisfaction.  Current research discusses that the way a woman feels about her body can influence her overall happiness, sex life, self-esteem, and many other facets of her life.  This makes sense.  If you don't feel great about your body, it's going to have a trickle down effect. 

I often wonder why perfectly beautiful, intelligent women base their body satisfaction on bullshit dictated to them by assholes.  And those assholes aren't always men.  They are often other women.  You "should" be this size.  You "should" be this number on a scale.  You "should" not have an ounce of fat on your body.  You "should" not be so muscular.  You "should" stop feeding into bullshit that is so unbelievably anti-feminine.

Yes.  We all have moments of frustration with our bodies where we say, hmmm...maybe I'm not my healthiest or maybe I'm feeling like I've let my shit go a bit.  Maybe you have PMS and you really just need someone to remind you of how fucking spectacular you are.  That's fine, and that's not what I'm talking about.  I'm talking about ripping yourself apart body part by body part, finding flaws where there do not exist, and fixating on numbers that have nothing to do with the person you are.  For instance, if you are denying yourself an amazing sexual experience because you feel like you look a little bloated today:  HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM.  If you miss out on a great party because you feel "too fat" to be in public, that isn't good.  And if your day gets ruined because your up a pound, I'm talking to you. 

So ladies, please be kind to yourselves.  Accept that there is only one Heidi Klum and you aren't her.  That is NOT a bad thing because there is only one, amazingly, spectacular, gorgeous you.  And guess what?  There is someone out there who will appreciate every dimple of cellulite on that ass of yours because they love the beautiful, human being that is you.  Until you find them, for the love of God,  LOVE YOURSELF- every wonderful, imperfect morsel.

You may be thinking, "thanks for the pep talk, now how do I love myself?"  That is a loaded question that can really only answered by you.   But here are some suggestions:

*Be body positive and if you find yourself indulging in negative self-talk, notice it and stop.  Move on.

*Surround yourself with a body positive posse and if this is something you and your girlfriends struggle with, take on the challenge to stop engaging in negative body talk as a group.
* Focus on health and what exercises and foods make you feel good, healthy, strong, and happy
*Find things you are passionate about and do them

 I would like to give a big thanks to all the men out there who support women and make them feel spectacular about their bodies.  You guys fucking rock!!!!