Fuck you shitty mantras!

I'm not sure when you start hearing these messages:  You aren't good enough.  You aren't worth it.

Maybe it is when you are young and you get that first look of disapproval from your parents.  It could be the first time you got a grade in school that wasn't an A+.  That first time someone rejected you or bullied you. When you were first told you weren't smart enough, or pretty enough, or athletic enough, or good enough to deserve the life you want.  These messages stay with us for a long time.  They become ingrained in us and damage us to our core when we do not let go of them.

These shitty  little mantras have become ingrained in me as I am sure they have become ingrained in many of you. As you carry them into adulthood, sometimes they even served us well.  I'm a competitive person, so I'm always on a mission to prove these fuckers wrong.  This can be empowering in some ways, and discouraging in others.  No matter how many doctoral degrees I get under my belt, will I ever feel smart enough?  No matter how many pounds I put on the bar, will I ever feel strong enough?  No matter how many times someone tells me I'm beautiful or that they love me, will I ever really believe them? 

These messages hold me back.  They make things that are not meant to make me feel inadequate, feel that way.  When my coach critiques my form, I hear "You're not good enough," instead of, "Do this, and you will be more efficient."  I notice this in my fellow doctoral students.  Some of us were recently having heart attacks over 92s on our papers.  Yikes.  Some find inadequacy in their jobs and financial statements.  I don't make a six figure salary.  I must not be as good as Joe Schmo who is driving a beamer.  My occupation isn't worthwhile or important. I don't deserve to make money because I love what I do.  They pop up in our relationships with others.  My child is misbehaving, that makes me a bad parent.  My significant other is having a bad day, I must not be doing enough.  When we look at these messages on paper, we realize the ridiculousness of them, however, we still engage in the thoughts.

We are adequate.  We are amazing.  We are what we are meant to be in this moment, learning the lessons we need to be taught.  Anytime one of these "shit mantras" come into your mind, I challenge you to tell it to fuck off. Overcome these voices, because they no longer apply. 

You are more than good enough.  You are totally, 100% worth it.
  
xoxox
J

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
 And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Marianne Williamson



xoxo
J